When the world is too Abrasive Cold Hard Mean Rude Cranky Frustrating Annoying Sad/Bad The invitation is always there (always) To crawl up on into Poppa’s lap And rest awhile Awhile
Abrasive
Hysterectomy
The searing heat sneaks up Surprises Roils to a peak And recedes Leaving me Tired And worn And wet And weak This poor bodies response to the loss of something core To who I am/was Its manifestation of Grief I’m sorry dear body I’m sorry I didn’t know what else to do You know as well as I that I Was Bleeding To Death Forgive me dear body Forgive me and Let’s find peace For you Again
Envy
I envy your stillness Your peace As I thrash about in the heat and mire Of Restless thoughts trapped in a Restless frame Jesus I look to You For peace In My limbs My joints My heart Peace in the wee hours When Your light Is dim In me
Coyote
I see you hunting Across the lake And your wild beauty is Wonderful to me
Spun out
I never imagined (in my wildest imaginings) Imagined I I would be one One of those Spun out of the church (the family of God for crying out loud how does this happen it's wrong on at least a thousand levels hyperbole intended) Well Not THE church (actually) A church I’m at a loss Poppa I don’t recognize myself I’m wearing clothes that don’t fit (because) I loved her so Still do (but) She didn’t love me back (not really) Because There wasn’t room for me (the me they imagined was welcome) But Not the me that actually was/is (he/them/they lower case intended made sure of that) Poppa hold me Hold me close I’m just so very sad (also) Thank you for new spaces New faces Who look on poor wretched me With love Love that feels like sounds like smells like looks like tastes like You You You (and so and still) I cry out to You Heal this broken soul Make me whole Help me trust Again
The Main Thing
Beloved Keep the Main Thing The Main Thing (and) I AM The Main Thing
Geese on Glass
Geese on glass Tentative Cautious (like we are) When We’re On Thin Ice
Sunday
Sunday Sunday (used to be a fun day) Sunday Sunday Sad Now I gulp down the grief (for all that was lost) And Go (to try) To trust (because) --- Because Of And In And Through And For YOU Jesus For You I trade my anger (towards the ones who poisoned the well) For forgiveness For peace For hope For faith For love For You
Tenacious
Tenacious leaves Clinging still Showing off Their shiny underbelly Reminding me That fall is all but finished And Winter is on its way
Bevy
A bevy of voices Beckon Call Teach Preach Shout Demand Speak Whisper Complain Confront Cajole Encourage Slam Text Tweet Post Broadcast Stream Podcast Remind (whew) But Jesus It's You Jesus Simply You Jesus (in and through and amongst and in spite of all that) That I Am listening For
Colleen R. Jantzen 