“Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ. Galatians 1:10 Can you tell? I can’t? (generally) Such a sticky wicket Oh Spirit of God Help me Search me Know me Set things right
Search me
“Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.” Psalm 139: 23-24 Search me And Know Test me And Know See if (oh my word, there’s a banquet there) (And please) Lead me out of the mire Away from the worst parts of myself Fear Worry Doubt Anger And all the rest of the mess
Rest
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. Matthew 11: 28 - 29 You can rest dear heart I’ve got this I’ve actually got this God
Trust
“In You Lord God, I put my trust.” Psalm 25.1 (NIV) Trust In You Not in: My bank account My family My husband My health My house My job My friends My government In You Period . Trying
Heal our Land
“If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land.” 2 Chronicles 7:14 NIV Just a cursory glance Reveals the pervasive darkness within Forgive me Cleanse me Hear me Heal our land
Two geese
The two geese returning yesterday Were a singular comfort to me Spring is still coming They are not worried Consider the birds of the air
Daily
“Give us today our daily bread.” Matthew 6:11 NIV Not a recurring subscription Not two weeks (or more) supply Just daily Everything I need to live From Your big hand To my small one Today Dad Thank you
Dependence
All that is required is to live a natural life of absolute dependence on Jesus Christ. Oswald Chambers
Today The only absolute thing Is To Stay behind (not out front) To watch To listen To follow
The Waiting Place
The waiting place – as Dr. Seuss rightly points out, is a hard lonely too quiet place to be. I’m there now. Waiting for my heart to be restored. Waiting for our community to be restored. Waiting for my home to be restored. Waiting for the return of joy, a ready laugh — hope.
And in the waiting what to do? What exactly is one to do? Be faithful in little seems reasonable — logical (if difficult). Look for the silver lining in this cloud and fog. Believe and hope in a God who has my future secure (somehow…though not in the way I thought). And speak and think truthfully from the heart.
It’s no good saying “I love the waiting place”. That I understand the waiting place, that I feel secure here, that I am at peace, when I’m not and I don’t.
The One who knows me best. Knows the verity of my every thought and of my every word spoken and un. He knows better.
So why lie.
Colleen R. Jantzen 